Stevie Ray's August Business Journal Column: Ditch the Pitch

Published: Mon, 08/01/16

www.stevierays.org Contact Us via E-Mail Phone: 950-500-9230

August 1, 2016

Ditch the pitch: Why networking feels bad

Click the photo above to link to the video.

I am about to make a lot of old-schoolers very angry. I am about to denounce one of the most venerated traditions in the world of networking. Networking is nothing more than kids meeting on a playground and making stuff up.I am here to say that, when it comes to the elevator pitch, we must ditch the pitch.

For those living under a rock for the past few decades, the elevator pitch is a 30-second prepared statement that is supposed to sum up your business; ostensibly in preparation for the off-chance that you might meet a prospect in an elevator and you only have the length of an elevator ride to make a connection.

Frankly, I have ridden in elevators tens of thousands of times and the only thing people do is stare at the lighted floor numbers. Nonetheless, I contend that the elevator pitch was the worst thing to happen to networking since the open bar. I must write fast now; there is an angry mob of men in wide ties and square-toed shoes and women in sock buns gathering outside my office with pitchforks and Zippo lighters.

Nothing is better than something

To be fair, the impetus behind the elevator pitch was genuine. So many people didn’t know how to respond to the question, “So, what do you do?” that having a prepared response seemed better than nothing. However, there are many times when nothing is actually better than something. An elevator pitch fails on so many levels that is often destroys trust rather than builds a connection.

Let’s take the fails one at a time. First, elevator pitches inherently sound disingenuous. Anything that you repeat over and over will eventually sound canned. And the more we repeat the same phrase, the more we subconsciously speed up the delivery. The faster the delivery, the less genuine you sound. A large part of trust is based on whether people sound genuine. Second, elevator pitches ignore the listener. When people ask what it is that you do, unless they are just being polite, they are trying to determine if there is enough of a match to pursue a deeper relationship.

Spouting off a 30-second spiel means that everyone you meet gets the same picture of you, regardless of their needs. If you meet a person who is shy and withdrawn, he or she requires a delivery that is different than the “let’s get right down to bidness” type, who, in turn, needs a different delivery than the “I just want to chat for a while” person. Even the same pitch delivered in different styles cannot satisfy all three personality types.

Reacting in the moment

By now you might be asking, “Okay, smarty. How am I supposed to know what to say if I don’t have something in the bag?” I learned the answer to this from an unlikely source. Being a practitioner of improvisation, I had the opportunity to train with Paul Sills, the founding director of The Second City, one of the more well-known centers of improvisation in America.

Most people know of improvisation, or “improv,” through the TV show, Whose Line Is It Anyway? Improv is a popular style of comedy, but because of its basis in powerful communication skills it is quickly gaining attention as a training tool for business. Toward the end of his life, Sills conducted master’s classes for improv professionals. At the start of the week-long course I attended, he said to my group, “We’re going to practice improv, but for Pete’s sake don’t make anything up.” This had many of us looking at our brochures to make sure we were in the right place.

“But sir,” one student said, “doesn’t improv require making things up?” “No!” yelled Sills (he was a cranky old guy). “Improv is like life. It is reacting in the moment. The worst thing you can do in life is try to control the outcome. That means you are thinking ahead. When you think ahead, you ruin the ‘right now.’ Thinking ahead will cause you to script out what everyone should say and do. We call that ‘playwriting,’ and it is the opposite of being in the moment. Playwriting leaves your partner out of the picture.”

The student pressed on, “But then how do we know what to say?” Paul’s answer is the one philosophy that should lead all interactions between people. He said, “Simple. Your partner will tell you exactly what to say to make the interaction a success. All you have to do is listen. The trouble is, most people don’t listen. They just wait to talk.”

Don't just wait to talk, listen

We spent the entire week not learning what we expected. We learned how to listen. Sills was a master at seeing if you had a script silently running through your head. He would stop us in the middle of an exercise by yelling, “If you want to be a playwright, send us the script so we can memorize it for you. Be in the moment and let your partner play, too.”

To teach being in the moment in my networking workshops, I have the participants play a game where one person stands in front of a group of six others. Each person asks the same question, “So, what do you do?” The person who is “it” has to answer the question, but with a different answer for each person in the circle.

People usually panic at this rule, so I just remind them that, as long as they listen to the manner in which the question is asked, the answer is given to them in the way the question is asked. If you find yourself saying the same thing over and over, you aren’t in the moment; you are playwriting. Networking is nothing more than kids meeting on a playground and making stuff up. Kids don’t overthink every new encounter, they just greet, talk, and play. Stay in the moment, and ditch the pitch.

Stevie Ray has been a nationally recognized corporate trainer and speaker for more than 25 years, helping companies improve communication skills, teamwork, innovative thinking, leadership, and customer service. He is the Executive Director of Stevie Ray’s Improv Company in Minnesota, providing training and entertainment since 1989. He has been a columnist for American City Business Journals since 1997.

www.stevierays.org | Have a Comment or Question? | Phone: 952-500-9230